“If God was to tell me to get out of the way… would I still stay put, or will I step away?
Should He want to use me or set me aside, either way I pray He would humble me to do either”.
I’m from a town in Namibia called Windhoek, best described for its dust and desert. Yet when the sun would start falling from the sky, I would always find myself somewhere isolated before my grandmother’s piano playing chords I don’t know the names of and singing songs I can’t remember the words off. I would describe the music I write to be honest and transparent, addressing issues within myself and hopefully in others. Yet, lately I am writing songs that I call the “closed curtain section”. My heart would be to bring across a sound that doesn’t speak to the lover of our souls as if He is our brother but seeking the intimacy we can have with God. I am at ease with spontaneous making up of songs and flowing into unknown territory.
I always found God to pull me into ministry by the scruff of the neck and the very thing I have often resisted doubtlessly brought me the greatest joy.
After recording 3 albums, “Oopmond” ( Afrikaans), “The Cure” and “Someone with skin” and winning a few awards, I only realized that no one can contain glory and the Glory of God cannot be touched by anyone. When 14 thousand people stare at you with expecting eyes it leaves you scared. Dead scared.
I have been to France, Holland, the UK, Nashville, Russia, Mozambique, Australia and other places finding that the heart of worship would be the only way to cross cultural and language barriers.
The crowds and expectations drove me into local church where I became a daughter in a family and a nobody to society. No one can be sustained outside of the fellowship of a healthy church and accountability with leaders who you allow to speak into your life.
If I cannot put His bride above my own dreams I’m not yet ready for recognition. There is nothing worse than for a person to be promoted before the right time.
Maturity isn’t having it all together but it’s about how quickly we run from our insecurities back into the very heart of Christ, to the place where we are accepted not for what we do but because of His great LOVE.
May God open our eyes.